Half-Assed Runner

Archive for October, 2012

For the second year in a row I ran the Monster Dash 10 Mile race.  Last year this was probably my happiest running experience as I ran the entire 10 miles without walking which was my longest continuous run ever.  Since then I’ve run a bunch of half marathons and even managed to finish a marathon.  My longest continuous run now stands around 18.5 miles.  But the Monster Dash 10 Mile run remains a bright spot as I never thought I could run double-digit miles without stopping.

This year I debated either skipping the Monster Dash or running the half marathon instead.  I managed to meet my quota of 12 half marathons this year and I’m burned out on the distance.  My wife decided last year that she wanted to do the Monster Dash and I convinced her to try the 10 mile distance.  I finally decided to run it with her.  I offered to pace her, but she decided she didn’t need/want me helping her, so I was free to run my own race.  This worked out great as I needed a “win” after disappointing results in my last few races.

I got to skip the expo this year as my wife picked up our packets.  The jacket is pretty nice this year and I like it better than last year’s jacket.  It still has the “woman’s zipper”, but fits well and feels good.

Race morning rolled around and neither of us were too excited to run.  We’ve both been suffering from mild head colds.  Plus it was 24 degrees when we woke up.  I told my wife that it was the same last year as it was 26 degrees at the start of the race last year.  It was actually a bit warmer (30 degrees) this year, but did not warm up during the course of the race as much as last year.

We hit the road and instead of trying to use 94 to get to the start of the race, we decided to attack it from the south.  Great idea, except for the fact that 494 went to one lane around the airport.  I wasn’t panicking because were being driven by a friend of ours and would be dropped off with plenty of time to get the race.  In fact, that’s what happened: we got dropped off about 1.5 miles from the start.  I was wearing my manly tights with running shorts over them and a short-sleeved tech shirt.  I was wearing the Monster Dash jacket over the shirt.  I planned to leave the jacket, but I was too damn cold to do it.  I knew I would not be able to keep the jacket on the entire run, so I would have to tie it off around my waist.  My wife was in costume (I went as a “runner” again this year) with 4 layers.  She said later she got hot around mile 2, but was fine afterwards.  We obviously have different biological temperature regulation units. 

We got to the start line around 8:20.  I was shocked that there was plenty of room for runners to line up.  I decided to start with my wife so we lined up just in front of the 10 minute pacer.  The cumulative body heat of 10,000 runners warmed me up so that I probably could have done without the jacket.

Soon enough the race was underway.  We moved forward about 100 feet, then stopped dead.  I don’t know if Team Ortho did wave starts or not.  If so, we were in the first wave.  It took over 5 minutes of walking, but once we hit the starting mats we were able to start running immediately.

I stuck with my wife for the first half mile.  I figured that we were just under 10 minutes per mile as the pacers did not pass us.  I picked up the pace slightly to get past some large groups of runners.  I was surprised when Endomondo announced a 9:11 first mile.  It felt at least 30 seconds slower than that.  I was pretty happy to hear this pace as I wanted to run this race around a 9:20 pace.  A mile later, Endomondo told me that I clocked a 9:02 mile.

I felt like I was pushing just a tiny bit but felt fine.  The biggest issue was the jacket.  As I warmed up, I unzipped it more and more.  By mile 2, it was completely unzipped.  I would have to take it off and tie it around my waist.  Not a big deal, but it would kill time.  It didn’t really matter much as the first water stop was almost 3.5 miles into the race and I was getting pretty thirsty by that point.  I walked the entire stop and drank a cup of water and blue stuff.  This would be my slowest mile (9:29).

I was feeling great at this point and miles 5 and 6 were just under 9 minutes each.  I knew that the course was a gentle downhill, but last year I didn’t appreciate how beneficial that is.  After some hilly halfs this year, I was loving this course.

I went without music until mile 6.  The combination of the crowds and costumes kept my mind occupied.  I took a GU at the water stop around mile 6.5.  This was the only mistake I made.  I ate a flavor I hadn’t tried before: Mandarin Orange.  I figured that you can’t really mess up orange, but this thing tasted like medicine and ass.  Miles 6 through 9 were all run around a 9:15 pace.

I kept holding back a little bit as I wanted to make sure I had some energy left for the last mile.  There was only one hill of any significance and it was around mile 7.  I knew that the last half mile was downhill and fast, so I was saving my energy for that.  I felt great.  Nothing hurt, I was pushing the pace only slightly, and I was feeling much better after removing the jacket (hell, I was sweating in the 30 degree weather).

I didn’t see the mile marker for mile 9, but Endomondo announced it.  I toyed with really picking it up at this point, but I was feeling slightly tired and didn’t want to fizzle out prior to the end.  I told myself I would speed up after passing the giant inflatable rainbow bridge.  Unfortunately, that bridge was not on the course this year.  Rather unceremoniously, the 10 milers and half marathoners split and I could see the finish line.  I picked up my pace and finished with an 8:35 final mile.  The race clocked showed 1:37, so I wasn’t sure of my chip-time, but I was happy to see it as just south of 1:32.  I had shaved 10 minutes off of last year’s time and felt great.  It was nice to have a good race for the first time in quite some time.

I nabbed the standard Team Ortho food bag (banana, chips, mini salted nut roll).  I was a little disappointed that there was no bottled water (there were cups of water) and no foil blankets like last year.  Not a big deal as I had my jacket with me.  I saw the line for the buses to the half marathon finish area and was glad I didn’t have to wait in it this year.  I think that the bag check was at the half finish, so bag check would have been a waste (and a logistical nightmare) for me this year.

I walked back past the finish line and waited for my wife.  She had a great race as well and finish only a bit slower than I did last year.

We found our friends and our son and started walking back to the car.  Little did I know that this would be an almost 2 mile hike.  It was still just above freezing and I was cold as hell by the time we got to the car.  We did get to see the sweeper car and the last runner as she hit mile 8 [I would HATE to be the last runner as the sweeper was literally 15 feet behind her].

My wife wanted to head to the half marathon finish line to enjoy a beer.  I was shivering by this point even with the car’s heat cranked and I talked her out of it.  We decided to hit Coopers in Saint Louis Park as she could still get her free beer and I could avoid the crowds and hopefully warm up.  When we got to Coopers we were the only runners there.  By the time we left, there was a pretty long wait for tables as a bunch of Monster Dash runners (many from the 5K race in Minneapolis) had the same idea we did.  After three cups of coffee and some tomato basil soup, I was finally warm enough to drink my victory Guinness.

We had a great time at this race.  It’s a huge race (they announced 11,000 10 mile and half marathoners (but only 9400 finishers, so that might have been inflated/rounded up) and 3,000 5K runners (in Minneapolis)), but I feel it’s really well-organized.  The course is an absolute dream to run as it’s pretty and downhill or flat for 95% of the race (10 mile).  The swag is nice and so is the medal (I’m kind of burned out on the Team Ortho wedge medals though).  It’s a blast to see all of the crazy costumes and there is great crowd support as well.  I will probably do this race again next year.

Six days ago I struggled through my first marathon.  An intelligent runner would be enjoying a nice break from running and recovering.  I has not the smart.  Instead I was running my 11th half marathon.

The race begins and ends at Court Square Park, which is home to the nation’s only two-story outhouse.

Yup. 

I did not want to run today.  I woke up at 7 am to an overcast, chilly morning.  I was in no mood to run.  It was a one hour drive to Belle Plaine and I had to get there before the 9 am start in order to pickup my packet.  I dinked around until just before 8 am.  This meant I was going to need to haul ass to make it to the start on time.  Luckily, the drive is through farm country and I made it to the park in Belle Plaine and picked up my packet with enough time to jog back to my car and stow the t-shirt.

The sky was still overcast, but the promised rain never fell other than a slight on and off drizzle.  I decided to wear a long-sleeved black tech shirt and shorts.  I was pretty cold at the start.  This was a smaller event (about 180 half marathoners) but there were pacers, so I lined up with the 2:10 pacer at the start.  Soon enough the race started and my weary legs started to propel me forward.

I had no expectations other than to finish this race.  I still don’t have my legs back 100% from the marathon.  It felt pretty liberating to not worry about pace.  I was surprised when I finished the first mile (a circuitous jaunt through the town) in 9:06.  I felt like I was running much slower.  I started to wonder if maybe I had fast run in me.  I was right behind the 2:05 pacer…who was about 10 feet behind the 2:00 pacer.  That bewildered me.  I suppose that after 1 mile there is only about a 25 second difference between the two pacers, but they were much closer than that.  We left town and started on a downhill after the first mile.  This gave me a little bit of hope that I might be able to make a run at 2 hours.  The hills soon dashed that idea from my skull.I had peeped the elevation profile and there was a big hill around mile 7.  What I did not notice was that there were a number of other smaller hills on the course.  From mile 2 to mile 6, the course was basically one long 200 foot climb.  I dropped behind the 2:05 pacer (who was still within twenty feet of the 2:00 pacer) at mile 2 and settled into a slower pace.

The course ran on roads that were not fully closed off with a brief gravel stretch through a construction area.  There were only a few sections that ran right along the river, but there was enough variation to make it a very nice course.

I carried my big (24 ounce) bottle with me.  I had planned on just bringing the smaller (10 ounce) bottle, but could not find it in my gym bag.  I only had enough Gatorade to fill the bottle half way, so I was treated to the sloshing of the liquid.  This made me start listening to music very early on in this race.

After the water stop around four miles in, another runner pulled up on my right and we started chatting.  I never do this, but for the next few miles we ran together.  He was running this as his last long run before a marathon next week.  I was happy to chat away as it took my mind off the miles.  We reached the big hill around mile 7 – which turned out to be only the third steepest hill – and we powered over it.  I honestly would have walked that sucker if I had been alone.  On the downhill I inadvertently picked up the pace so were running 8:30/mile at the 8 mile water stop.  I walked through the water stop and he continued on ahead of me.  I dialed back my pace as I was starting to tire a bit.

I struggled a bit from miles 8 to 11.  I was thinking that after running a marathon last week, that a half marathon would feel like a 5K.  Not so much.  My pace was relaxed, but I was definitely losing steam.

At the 10.5 mile point, the course hits its lowest point, then starts uphill for the remainder of the race.  The water stop around this area was fun though.  I started seeing signs with questions like “What do you call a dog with no legs?” then a few hundred feet later another sign with the answer “It doesn’t matter.  He won’t come”.  There were a handful of these cheesy jokes and the signs kept me smiling and took me away from the hilly misery that was the end of this race.

I knew I was not in any position to PR on this course, but I was taking pride in the fact that I had not walked at all (other than through the water stops).  That ended 12.5 miles in.  At mile 12 there was a huge hill as we ran back into town.  I (slowly) ran the first half of it, but ended up taking two walk breaks on the second half.  After cresting the hill, I only had enough energy to make a half-hearted dash for the finish line.

My time was pretty crap, but I didn’t care.  I had a pretty good time, except for that last hill.  The course was challenging, yet it did live up to the “scenic” moniker.  It would have been more scenic had the weather been clearer.  The medal was crappy, but the race cost $40 and was part of the Explore Minnesota Challenge, so I had no complaints.  After the race you voted for the best water stop (I chose the one with the goofy signs) and then were given a ticket for a free beer.  There were plenty of treats afterwards as well.

Next week I run my 12th and final half marathon in Mankato.